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Dr. Blume's Article of the Month
How To Rid Yourself of Bad Habits
by Ginger E. Blume, Ph.D.
We all have habits---some good; some bad. What qualifies
as a habit? It is a routine practice that is done in the same way for the
same reason, over and over again. A habit becomes second nature and is
intrinsically neither good nor bad. When a habit is negative, it hinders
or harms and when a habit is positive, it fosters health, self-esteem, and
interpersonal relationships.
You may be wondering why we develop habits and whether habits are
important or not? Habits help us establish order and allow us to do things
automatically, with little thought. This in turn, allows us to focus on
other areas of our lives that demand our immediate attention. Originally,
our habits are developed because they meet a perceived need. When they no
longer meet a need, they continue on automatic and may be reinforced by
people around you.
Stages of Change Typical bad habits include drinking
alcohol, smoking, using drugs, gambling, nail biting, lying,
procrastinating, cursing, cheating, etc. Like most people, you probably
have at least a few bad habits you’d like to change. How do people change
their habits? After all, change is not easy. First, if you want to stop a
bad habit, decide on one habit you personally want to change (not should
change). Also, make sure you don’t choose to change a habit just because
it will please someone else. Next, explore your readiness to change.
Psychologists, Prochaska and DiClemente have studied and described the
process of how people change a negative behavior or habit. They have
portrayed the following five stages people usually go through in their
mind before they actually effect a change. When successful, these stages
are progressive, building toward an eventual commitment to change:
The Five Stages:
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PRECONTEMPLATION – the person sees no need to change |
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CONTEMPLATION – the person recognizes the problem
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PREPARATION – the person plans for change, but tomorrow
(not now) |
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ACTION – the person admits to having a problem and starts
taking positive behavior/action |
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MAINTENANCE – the person continues the new, positive
behavior for more than 6 months |
Planning for Change Once you’ve
reached the Preparation Stage, you can plan to change in the following
way:
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1. Make a list of what you’ll gain or how you’ll benefit
from accomplishing your goal. |
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2. Break it into small doable steps and brainstorm
multiple ways to achieve those steps. |
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3. Choose 3-4 action steps that are objective and
measurable.
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4. Set a timeline with a set date to re-evaluate your
progress.
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5. Decide on some immediate rewards you’ll use for
positive steps you accomplish.
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6. And finally, don’t forget to enlist the support and
encouragement of others and remember to remind yourself of previous
successes. |
“The 5 Stages of How People Change” indicate that “action”
or external change only occurs after a person has fully engaged in the
preparation stage. By engaging in this process, one becomes a “change
manager” rather than a “change victim.
If you have a goal to break a bad habit, first identify when you do the
negative behavior and second, analyze what is triggering this behavior.
You’ll also want to evaluate the benefits and dangers of changing.
Consider the following:
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What pleasure or release of tension does the habit
produce? |
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What harm is the habit causing? |
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What will improve by breaking the habit? |
Action: Making a Change Once you’ve
explored these questions, you’ll need to prepare for action. Begin this
process by removing any temptations associated with your bad habit. You
can also create obstacles to interfere with past things that maintained
your bad habit. Next, try to reduce your overall stress level since stress
is often a trigger for engaging in a bad habit. I also recommend you
enlist the support of your friends and family. Find valuable reinforcers
and rewards and then commit and act. Throughout the change process,
maintain a log of your habit behavior - when, where, what feeling, and any
obstacles. Be fair to yourself and remember this: the bad habit was not
“built in a day” and neither will it be destroyed or replaced in a day.
Research shows that the average smoker attempts to quit approximately
seven times before s/he is successful. So no matter how slow, keep trying.
“People do not fail; they only give up trying.”
Bad Habit or Addiction? Sometimes, after numerous
attempts to change a bad habit, a person may want to consider if s/he is
dealing with more than just a bad habit. Sometimes, repeated failure is
indicative of a serious addiction. An addiction results in a loss of
control and usually involves a compulsive use of a mood or mind altering
chemical(s), along with the inability to stop the use in spite of the fact
that such use is causing problems in one’s life. The person may have a
physical and/or psychological dependence on a substance. Some experts also
apply this term to compulsive behaviors that produces chemical changes in
the brain, such as gambling or compulsive sex. Unlike something that is
simply a bad habit, an addiction, such as taking a substance becomes the
sole focus of one’s life.
If you’re not sure whether you’re dealing with a bad habit or an addition,
the following signs may suggest that you need professional help with an
addiction:
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Multiple tries to break the bad habit have been
unsuccessful. |
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You give up other things that are important to you in
order to indulge your habit. |
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You continue the negative behavior even though you know
it’s damaging you and your relationships. |
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You have symptoms of withdrawal or overwhelming feelings
of sadness, anxiety or depression when your stop. |
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You need more and more of the substance or behavior to
obtain the same level of pleasure or satisfaction.
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Summary If you believe you’re ready
to make a change, remember these tips: 1) Give yourself sufficient time to
change. 2) Set realistic expectations and goals 3) Focus on 1-2 change
strategies at a time. 4) Think in terms of small steps. 5) Review and
reward your progress daily. 6) Seek help when needed.
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