Over the past two and a half decades, I've
primarily come to view my role as a consultant on life issues, a coach
and a guide. I prefer understanding people's struggles within the
context of their complicated lives, rather than labeling them with some
mental disorder (a common practice in the field of psychotherapy).
Unlike the medical model, I prefer focusing on emotional and spiritual
health, as well as prevention, rather than pathology and brokenness.
Many of the complaints, pains and hardships that
trouble the average person don't stem from deep-seated problems,
defective genes, or chemical imbalance. A complex interplay of
bio-psycho-social factors shape our lives. Hence, emotional healing
must be approached from a holistic perspective. Self-knowledge is a
pathway to wisdom, freedom and happiness.
I prefer not to work with insurance companies,
especially managed care organizations unless they are respectful of the
clients' right to privacy (confidentiality), and the right of doctors
and clients to jointly determine how treatment should proceed. When
therapy is micromanaged by a company focused on cost containment,
treatment suffers. My main concern with managed care organizations is
the absence of client privacy. Managed care organizations require
psychotherapists to provide written reports of intimate details about
clients' lives and to mail or fax this information to clerks. It is
frightening to realize that clients' personal lives are logged into
large company computers. Once entered into the computer, highly
sensitive information may easily end up on national data banks, sold for
profit, or indiscreetly shared with your employer. Despite newer HIPAA
laws it has been documented that legal or illegal access to client
records is almost impossible to control. I am fully committed to the
privacy of my clients and will not cooperate with immoral or dangerous
insurance company policies.
Many couples come to consult with me at times of
crisis, or when they fall out of love (into reality) and they are not
sure if they want to remain married. My first commitment is to help
couples stay together and teach them how to love and be loved better.
Hopefully, with help, they can turn the marriage around to a mutually
enhancing relationship where each person is respected, honored, and
celebrated by the other. In healing a love-depleted marriage, we
discover how each person has contributed to "falling out of love." The
dance between the lovers must be changed to restore intimacy. I also
believe it is the moral obligation of parents with children to try to
save the marriage by going to counseling before they file for divorce.
If this fails, divorcing with decency must be the second commitment.
Children are the future of our world and we must provide them with
stable, consistent, loving caretakers who remain committed to raising
them long after a divorce is finalized.
I offer premarital counseling for couples prior
to their engagement or marriage. This is an exciting opportunity for
couples to map the hopes and concerns that lie ahead. It is the perfect
time to identify the strengths and weaknesses of each person,
expectations they have for a spouse, parenting desires, spiritual needs,
financial expectations, etc. in an open and realistic manner. I believe
the art of loving requires commitment and self-discipline.
In summary, most people can live, love, and
enjoy their work better through the process of consulting an expert from
time to time. In an era when community and extended family ties are
weakened and holders of wisdom have lost their traditional rolls, my
mission is to contribute to the collective psychological/spiritual
health and education of individuals and the community at large. I help
people, one person at a time, discover and move toward fully living
their life purpose and dreams.